0:01
where can you find a positive attitude I
0:04
don't know if it's possible just to go
0:05
to the library and say yes I'd like the
0:07
section of books on positive attitudes
0:10
so do you buy a book and then you read
0:11
that book and you have a positive
0:13
attitude although I suppose that's
0:15
possible but I noticed there aren't any
0:16
sections that say the negative attitude
0:18
section if you want that over there so
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the thing that I love so much about
0:22
gratitude and attitude of gratitude is
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it does give you a positive attitude PMA
0:28
positive mental attitude I remember
0:29
hearing about that when I was in college
0:30
and high school and how important that
0:32
was how you think but there's different
0:34
elements about it too the relationship
0:36
that you have with yourself is so
0:37
important and how you can strengthen
0:39
that and really like the person that you
0:41
are will help with a positive mental
0:43
attitude hanging out with positive
0:45
people makes a huge difference getting
0:47
away from people that are not healthy
0:50
for you is something else that's so so
0:52
very important because you're known by
0:53
The Company You Keep and you know they
0:55
say One Bad Apple will spoil a whole
0:57
bunch but that to have a little uh
1:00
exercise I do called The Association
1:02
evaluator so think about this in your
1:04
world right now you can write this down
1:06
if you want but you can also just think
1:08
about it this is called the association
1:10
evaluator and so think about zero one or
1:12
two people in your life that you should
1:14
disassociate with they're just not good
1:16
for you and they're negative or they're
1:18
downers or they're whatever they are and
1:19
they're always dumping on you and
1:21
telling you their problems and maybe not
1:23
communicating with you as well or asking
1:24
you but just dumping them dumping their
1:26
things on you think about maybe
1:29
disassociating with those people next
1:31
write down zero one or two people that
1:34
you want to limit your association with
1:36
and these are the people that maybe it's
1:38
a coworker somebody you can't get away
1:40
from maybe it's a relative or somebody
1:42
that is in your world that you can't
1:44
really get away from so you just want to
1:46
limit your association with those people
1:47
don't go to any extra time to spend time
1:49
with them because it's just not good for
1:51
you but just try to make it minimal but
1:53
just do the best you can to get through
1:55
those encounters with those people the
1:57
third thing the disassociation limit and
1:59
this is my favorite the third thing one
2:02
zero one or two people you want to
2:04
enhance your association with these are
2:07
people that you spend you you just enjoy
2:10
the time with them and they ask you
2:12
questions and it's a very good
2:13
conversation it's a tennis match back
2:15
and forth it's not just a one-way
2:16
conversation they're asking you
2:18
questions asking how they can help and
2:20
so forth and the ultimate litmus test
2:23
for this Association evaluator is a
2:25
picture going to Starbucks and so with
2:27
the person you should disassociate with
2:29
you haven't hour with them for coffee
2:31
and you walk to your car and you think
2:32
you've been there in a week been there
2:34
for a week it's like oh my God I never
2:35
thought that was going to end that felt
2:37
like five or six days that's the person
2:39
you should disassociate with and by the
2:41
way just don't get in their face and say
2:44
yeah the Gratitude guy said I should
2:45
disassociate with you make sure that you
2:48
just say look we'll get together some
2:50
other time or something and just delay
2:52
it or put it off but you don't have to
2:53
get in there and tell them that directly
2:54
to their face just know that it's not
2:56
healthy for you and you need to spend
2:58
less time with that person it may be no
3:00
time at all so sometimes I had a friend
3:02
of mine once say I've had some great
3:04
friends that have become acquaintances
3:06
so some people become acquaintances some
3:08
people become people you know and some
3:10
people become people you used to know a
3:12
long time ago when things have changed
3:14
so think about that the second one the
3:17
limit the association you go to
3:18
Starbucks you have coffee with them for
3:20
an hour and it kind of feels like an
3:22
hour maybe an hour and a half and it's
3:23
it's not the worst thing but it's not
3:25
the best thing either and that's how you
3:26
kind of know you should limit your
3:28
association with them and then the third
3:30
my favorite is the one where you spend
3:33
an hour with a person at Starbucks and
3:34
you go to your car and it feels like you
3:36
were there 10 minutes it's like the best
3:38
the time just flew by it's a great
3:41
tennis match back and forth and the
3:42
conversations are going and they're
3:44
asking you questions and very engaged
3:46
and really listening to be a good
3:48
listener is such a huge thing too and so
3:51
think about that and and spent every
3:52
once maybe once a year twice a year stop
3:55
and do that little exercise for a minute
3:57
and I think it'll make a big difference
3:59
because it's so important because like
4:01
attracts like and if you want to find a
4:04
positive attitude think about people
4:06
that are positive around you and then
4:08
the more you extend your positivity to
4:11
them the more they'll come back to you
4:12
and you can avoid the negative Nellies
4:14
and the people that are not healthy for
4:16
you so think about that Association
4:18
evaluator and do that once or twice a
4:20
year it'll make a big difference and
4:22
that'll help you to find and maintain a
4:25
positive attitude that's it for today
4:27
I'm not gratitude guy remember be
