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Hey, Jared here from Eating Enlightenment. Today we're going to be talking about why people
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self-sabotage. Self-sabotage, let's just define it real quick, it's where you have a goal
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to be healthier, to stop binge eating, whatever your goal is, and you do behaviors that don't get
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you any closer to the goal. If your goal is to eat healthier, maybe you binge eat
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Why do people do stuff that's against their goals? Today we'll be talking about this big
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mindset called outside in. And this is the wrong type of mindset to have
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oftentimes people feel confused because they're following someone else's advice they're following their nutrition advice they're following some sort of plan a detox etc
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they're following it perfectly and then they sabotage and there can be a question
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why am I sabotaging when I'm following this plan perfectly? And it has to do with this mindset this person is in of outside
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They are listening to an outside source on how to be healthy
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outside does not take into account personal satisfaction it does not take into account
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how you feel does not take into account what is meaningful to you one story that brings this to
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mind was a latin american woman who had gone from nutritionist to nutritionist and they had all told
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her to cut out the right rice. However, white rice was something that gave her joy
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White rice was something that she grew up with. She learned to cook it as a young child growing up She cooked all the time with her family She fed it to her kids Being told to remove white rice totally stripped her of what was meaningful to her
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Her inside, her connection to food was not considered at all. It was follow this plan
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follow this advice, but it's external. It's someone else's plan. It's the
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other diet nutrition program that is out there. It's outside of your body. It's coming into you
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but your decisions about your health are not going from inside out
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So this helps explain why people self-sabotage. People can self-sabotage and many times because they're going outside in
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They are following a plan that doesn't quite, that doesn't quite match what's going on inside
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There's something off inside. But if you are in the wrong mindset, then all your attention, all your focus is on the outside, following the plan, following the rules, being perfect, you know, adherence, compliance
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This is a logical way of thinking. It comes from our masculine society, our patriarchal society
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And I'm not saying, I'm not taking this too extreme here, but our health approach as a culture is totally logical, totally external, totally measurement based
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It's totally outside. There can be a lot of value to being outside
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There can be structure. There can be, these things are important. Okay
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the masculine values are also important. I'm not saying to disregard the outside
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but we need to also have balance because when you just have the outside, when you are just
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working out five days a week when you are just following the plan even if you quote unquote successful at it if it isn balanced out by the feminine values
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by the inner connection, I was going to say creativity, but I said connection, connection
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the creative connection. If you don't have this juice, you feel it
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You feel what I'm saying? If you don't get this juice, this stuff that's in you
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If that stuff that is in you doesn't come out as an expression of your health, you are not going to be able to stick with anything long term because that's just the way the universe works
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We are yin and yang. If you just have yang, guess what
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You're going to fall out of balance. You can't just be logical about food
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It's great. Have some structure. This is a fear that some of my clients early on when they first
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hear about intuitive eating have, they fear that it's all feminine. They feel it's all intuition
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but no, you're getting a working with someone. There's always a little bit of structure
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There's always a regular way of eating flexible though. It's flexible. On the other hand
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there's a structure on one hand, but it's flexible on the other. Why do people binge eat
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They are lacking the feminine. Why do people self-sabotage rather? They are lacking the feminine, the connection
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When you lack this connection, you will self-sabotage. You will self-sabotage. Because you will self-sabotage because you need to heal
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If you aren't getting these healing inner qualities expressed through your journey, your journey will crash so that those elements are introduced
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Yin and Yang. If you can see the picture of Yin and Yang, about half the circle is black and about the other half of the circle is white
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But on the black side, there's always a circle that is white
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And on the white side there always a smaller circle that is black That means that even if you totally masculine you can ignore the feminine It in the masculine So if you just go all masculine guess what The seeds of destruction
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will sabotage you. Oftentimes people under eat, they develop low self-esteem
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They are deprived mentally, emotionally, and physically. This is what happens when you are outside of yourself, when you aren't overflowing with this inner sort of abundance, this inner connection with health and food that fits your unique personality, not personality, your unique history, your unique preferences, your unique body
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This is why people self-sabotage. Now, there's an article down below that goes through some more causes of why people self-sabotage
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Like we covered the deprivation, the mental and emotional deprivation, the physical deprivation, and the wrong mindsets
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You can check that out down below. Please like and subscribe to this channel
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It really helps me out. It gets this message of eating enlightenment out there into the world
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and then we'll wrap this video up. There should be a playlist over one of my shoulders
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that leads to an expert interview. I love interviewing people on the further perspectives around food
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There's an Eating Enlightenment podcast on iTunes and everywhere that you can download it
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And just to summarize, this outside-in approach is where the inner qualities are neglected
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You don't totally throw out the outside and go all into it
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You need to balance it. But so many people self-sabotage because they're only going outside
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They're only thinking, not feeling. They're only following instead of discovering. They're not engaged with the program because their inside has not been engaged
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We'll close it out for today. namaste